I used to think that if only men could wear skirts I'd be happy and wouldn't need to do any of this crossdressing malarky. But now I'm not so naive. Look at me in that dress below - is that just a desire to wear skirts? I don't think so. In fact my wish to be a girl predates any of my cross-dressing. It's clear to me that crossdressing is a symptom, not the main issue.
If I could wear skirts as a man, well yeah sure, it'd make Bob mode that much easier to bear, but if men wore skirts, I'd still find myelf wearing women's skirts, and dresses, not the ones for men.
skirts for men, are kinda plain. This is a blog by a guy who appears not to be transgendered but likes to wear skirts, and more discussion here.
When I started out on this journey I really only was interested in dresses and skirts. I'd try on whatever I had access to. But it obviously was never enough. I was conastantly driving myself to push it further. So I started trying on tops and skirts. Then tights. I wanted to have breasts too so the blouses fit me better, but never had the nerve to take it that far. I did really seem a step to far. But there was that day when I found a long colourful gypsy skirt and floaty blouse, which i put on, and a wide belt to give me a waist, and for the first time i saw myself in a female image. Though I wasn't to repeat this for many years, it was a landmark moment, and one I never forgot. I took to imagining if I put on shoes and walked out into the street dressed like that. It became an embellished fantasy for years.
And then when I began to dress again in my adulthood - I'd never completely given up but opportunities were few until my first wife walked out and, oddly, left most of her wardrobe behind, for a while anyway. Then I got the bug again. There were hippy chick skirts, a black wrap dress, some hippy tops and a really lovely gypsy dress. The other great thing that changed everything was the internet. and almost from the day I was connected I looked for other people like me. It encouraged me to start buying my own things. I started, funnily enough, by buying skirts. I bought hippy skirts, some odd formal skirts from a charity shop, and I signed up for a couple of catalogues. I bought tights, a shift dress a formal black skirt, jackets, a blouse and some t shirt tops. Oh...and a nightie. this was then the point of no return, which happened about 17 years ago now.
As a chap I'd been able to wear sarongs about the house with my wife's approval, and now on my own, I wore skirts - long floaty, little black a line ones, black pencil skirts, etc as much as possible, but also, sometimes tights, and usually a suitable top. Though I felt the hippy skirts went well with some of my t shirts; women's skirts in general did not go well with a man's wardrobe, or footwear.
I also began to shave my legs a this point - something I'd wanted to do for years!
After this I immersed myself fully in attempting to present as a female. so I bought make-up, shoes, an assortment of tops, skirts, dresses, a padded bra and plenty of tights and stockings. I borrowed my wife's coats, and she gave me an old Laura Ashley one from her youth, which, bizarrely, fitted me.
But I don't want to talk about this, I want to talk about my lazier cross-dressing. I call it cross dressing even though I it did not involve me trying to appear female, but once you've got a skirt on, you kind of need to wear a sympathetic top, and shoes, and possibly tights or stockings too. In fact it invariably takes you right back down the road to fully presenting as a female. Except it didn't quite. I found I actually liked the way I looked as a male in female clothes. In other words, a feminised male. In fact, I'm seriously considering that I may well be entirely content with this and will not wish to go any further.
I present pics as examples:
Here I am in a long dress, making no real attempt to look like a woman. I've allowed my hair to grow long, and applied a little lipstick, but that's it. I love this dress, and just don't see why I cannot wear it as I please. Just imagine wearing it out on a hot, slightly breezy day. It would be so lovely.
And on the right, no make up at all, a short skirt and lovely long winter coat. Again, nothing intrinsically feminine there, just nice clothes.
I have a day to day yearning to be a woman, i know this, but I'm not man enough to face the surgeon's knife - though I have considered cosmetic surgery to make me look more like a woman. i hate what i look at in the mirror, with stubble and male features, the way women interact with me, it's all wrong. Inside I do feel like a woman, or do I feel non-gendered. It might be the second. all I know for sure is I sure don't feel like a man. even shopping for male clothes causes me problems. I hate it, they are wrong, ugly, inelegant.
My method for buying male clothes is I imagine Lizzie choosing clothes for the man in her life, and I also pick clothes Lizzie might want to wear herself. Then when it comes to those things I cannot avoid - trousers, shirts, pants and socks, I buy the basic version when I need it, but all the time I look for suitable women's items to replace the male version, women's items that I could get away with in bob mode - cheesecloth tops, shirts, t-shirts, jumpers, trousers, trainers, but not so much dresses, skirts and blouses. Socks are proving a real bugger at the moment as I have rather big feet. Oddly shoes are proving to be much easier. why is that?
Anyway, the whole reconciling the two of me is going to be an ongoing project...watch this space for developments!
 |
| My choice of skirt in 2007 |
skirts for men, are kinda plain. This is a blog by a guy who appears not to be transgendered but likes to wear skirts, and more discussion here.
When I started out on this journey I really only was interested in dresses and skirts. I'd try on whatever I had access to. But it obviously was never enough. I was conastantly driving myself to push it further. So I started trying on tops and skirts. Then tights. I wanted to have breasts too so the blouses fit me better, but never had the nerve to take it that far. I did really seem a step to far. But there was that day when I found a long colourful gypsy skirt and floaty blouse, which i put on, and a wide belt to give me a waist, and for the first time i saw myself in a female image. Though I wasn't to repeat this for many years, it was a landmark moment, and one I never forgot. I took to imagining if I put on shoes and walked out into the street dressed like that. It became an embellished fantasy for years.
And then when I began to dress again in my adulthood - I'd never completely given up but opportunities were few until my first wife walked out and, oddly, left most of her wardrobe behind, for a while anyway. Then I got the bug again. There were hippy chick skirts, a black wrap dress, some hippy tops and a really lovely gypsy dress. The other great thing that changed everything was the internet. and almost from the day I was connected I looked for other people like me. It encouraged me to start buying my own things. I started, funnily enough, by buying skirts. I bought hippy skirts, some odd formal skirts from a charity shop, and I signed up for a couple of catalogues. I bought tights, a shift dress a formal black skirt, jackets, a blouse and some t shirt tops. Oh...and a nightie. this was then the point of no return, which happened about 17 years ago now.
As a chap I'd been able to wear sarongs about the house with my wife's approval, and now on my own, I wore skirts - long floaty, little black a line ones, black pencil skirts, etc as much as possible, but also, sometimes tights, and usually a suitable top. Though I felt the hippy skirts went well with some of my t shirts; women's skirts in general did not go well with a man's wardrobe, or footwear.
I also began to shave my legs a this point - something I'd wanted to do for years!
After this I immersed myself fully in attempting to present as a female. so I bought make-up, shoes, an assortment of tops, skirts, dresses, a padded bra and plenty of tights and stockings. I borrowed my wife's coats, and she gave me an old Laura Ashley one from her youth, which, bizarrely, fitted me.
But I don't want to talk about this, I want to talk about my lazier cross-dressing. I call it cross dressing even though I it did not involve me trying to appear female, but once you've got a skirt on, you kind of need to wear a sympathetic top, and shoes, and possibly tights or stockings too. In fact it invariably takes you right back down the road to fully presenting as a female. Except it didn't quite. I found I actually liked the way I looked as a male in female clothes. In other words, a feminised male. In fact, I'm seriously considering that I may well be entirely content with this and will not wish to go any further.
I present pics as examples:
 |
| blue checked dress |
Here I am in a long dress, making no real attempt to look like a woman. I've allowed my hair to grow long, and applied a little lipstick, but that's it. I love this dress, and just don't see why I cannot wear it as I please. Just imagine wearing it out on a hot, slightly breezy day. It would be so lovely.And on the right, no make up at all, a short skirt and lovely long winter coat. Again, nothing intrinsically feminine there, just nice clothes.
I have a day to day yearning to be a woman, i know this, but I'm not man enough to face the surgeon's knife - though I have considered cosmetic surgery to make me look more like a woman. i hate what i look at in the mirror, with stubble and male features, the way women interact with me, it's all wrong. Inside I do feel like a woman, or do I feel non-gendered. It might be the second. all I know for sure is I sure don't feel like a man. even shopping for male clothes causes me problems. I hate it, they are wrong, ugly, inelegant.
My method for buying male clothes is I imagine Lizzie choosing clothes for the man in her life, and I also pick clothes Lizzie might want to wear herself. Then when it comes to those things I cannot avoid - trousers, shirts, pants and socks, I buy the basic version when I need it, but all the time I look for suitable women's items to replace the male version, women's items that I could get away with in bob mode - cheesecloth tops, shirts, t-shirts, jumpers, trousers, trainers, but not so much dresses, skirts and blouses. Socks are proving a real bugger at the moment as I have rather big feet. Oddly shoes are proving to be much easier. why is that?
Anyway, the whole reconciling the two of me is going to be an ongoing project...watch this space for developments!
